Snowdrop moments: unexpected breakthroughs

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Love, love, love snowdrops don’t you. Little nuggets of resilience and pioneering spirit. Humble simple beauty when it’s least expected and looked for, when everything is cold & hard, and just when it’s needed to lift the spirits and urge us forward. I carefully divided and replanted some clumps of bulbs last autumn, and am enjoying watching them fight their way into flower in their new homes around the garden. For me they are a reminder of the fact that God is in the business of making everything new – and that begins now, in the unexpected; against the odds; tenacious; fragile and simple yet miraculously powerful breakthroughs that God allows to spring up ready to be found and rejoiced in. They remind me to rejoice with God in the small significant ‘newnesses’ that happen in our family life.

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A sewing birthday party attended despite huge anxiety and thoroughly enjoyed. Huge sense of achievement. The photo shows fluffy the bear, designed and sewed by T alongside a great group of girls from her class.

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T had homework this week to cook a healthy tea for her family!

Andrew helped, I provided emotional support! And T cooked chicken pasta. Exhausting.

Hidden in this amazing event was an equally amazing moment as T sat with B & A and a friend at the kitchen table and all ate some – a new recipe tried by everyone – don’t try & tell me God doesn’t break into our everyday, that’s definitely miraculous.

 

This morning A allowed T to sit in his room, and they peacefully ate breakfast alongside each other. (I know!!!)

College work, a very new way of presenting and handing in, is being completed.

We have had a visit from a good friend, who helps us in ways she probably doesn’t realize. And, in the same few days another friend came round so that Andrew & I could go out for a meal. I know, sounds so ordinary yet never ever taken for granted.

img_20190122_102331_045I am pressing on with the editing of another book – the one that sparked all the others – about time I focused on it again and got it ready to share with you, think you’re going to love it.

Last week I also travelled (not far, but even so, out of my little comfort zone) to help deliver a disability (or diffability as I like to think of it) awareness training session for the diocese and had the chance to share a bit about ‘sense of space’, our accessible worship at church and our experience. And we juggled school pick ups successfully between us.

All of these small, significant, moments – snowdrop moments if you like – can be moments to recognize God is at work in our midst. He is drawing us forward, revealing his faithfulness, his humour, his joy in who he has created each of us to be; leading us into his life – his overflowing, never ending aliveness that he pours into our lives. Tough circumstances, worries, lack of sleep, diffability; none of it stops God in his busyness of recreating. His aliveness is powerful enough to break through the hardest, coldest places of our lives in ways unexpected; against the odds; tenacious; fragile yet powerful.

 

 

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comfort zone

 

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In our household we talk about retreating to our ‘caves’ – the little cosy, personal spaces that are our escape places to retreat to and shut the world out of. They are not actually dark, or particularly cave-like at the moment but they have been at times; tents, dens, hidden corners under beds – even under sofa cushions, duvets or in kitchen cupboards at times. Safe ‘dark caves’ are actually really important. We need times where we can relax, guard down and know we are safe and all is well even if only for a short time.

Being ‘out of your comfort zone’ – being in situations, or doing tasks that are really challenging for you can be so tiring. I have been reminded of it this week. It was my turn to lead the singing at the toddler group – something I have been doing in different toddler groups for years yet still very out of my comfort zone! Without fail I come away from those few minutes feeling tired and drained. Context is everything isn’t it, I have sung with my own children, nieces and nephews since forever. How different it feels in a room full of expectant little ones – and their carers.

Yesterday I had a big out-of-my-comfort-zone day. It was an RE ethical debate for the year 10’s at secondary school, and I had been invited (and had willingly agreed I might add!) to be part of the panel giving my views on abortion, euthanasia and faith schools and then ready to answer questions afterwards. Exciting, invigorating, inspiring questions and insights from the students alongside shaking hands and legs and racing heart! I was in need of a darkened room once it had finished! But felt pleased to have taken part. Having the chance to explore different points of view, different faith beliefs and the complexity of these tough ethical questions is so vital. I’m always so thankful that these kinds of debates were always opened up for us around the table at home growing up and that we were always encouraged in finding our own thoughts and listening to the viewpoint of others.

On days where shaking hands and legs, and a racing heart are a big part of the experience a safe retreat space is needed. I would hazard a guess this is a daily experience for many autistic people facing situations, contexts and tasks that are challenging day in day out.

I spent some time at toddlers enjoying studying the church ceiling with a little one who I suspect was escaping to a safe retreat place for a few minutes, away from the noise and happy bustle of the large group (T does the same sometimes – often through a camera lens). We can find retreat spaces even in the most unexpected. Different places giving us that much needed rest at different times. Our loving Father God knows we need these retreat spaces. He offers himself as a hiding place for us. His presence the ultimate safe space of retreat. And just like we fill our cozy caves with things that we need to calm, and refresh us, God our Father’s presence is full to overflowing with love, faithfulness, acceptance and peace for us.

‘..hide me in the shadow of your wings’ (Ps 19:8 NIV)

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‘Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened,

and I will give you rest’. (Mt 11:28)

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
    will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
 I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress,
    my God, in whom I trust.’

                         ………

He will cover you with his feathers,
    and under his wings you will find refuge;
    his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. (Psalm 91: 1,2,4)

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